Mommy Memoirs - Things You Don't Want To But Have To Hear

As a new mum, there are a hundred strange, new and unexpected things that you can experience. I wonder if any of the mums I know managed to handle these, all by themselves. Each of us turn to someone close for all those queries, frights and fears that cross our minds. Thankfully for me I have my mum and sister to handle the silliest of questions that I may have.

To add to that, thanks to WhatsApp, I have a set of 'new mommy' friends who double up as mommy-wiki's for me. They were literally a ping away right through my 9 month journey and continue to be so. Thank you my mommy friends :-)

Now apart from this set of your chosen advisors, you are most likely to come across a dozen relatives, friends or passersby who will chip in with their unwelcome comments, probings and much more. If you did not encounter such people, you are surely blessed. For the record, I have tried to collect all such questions/ comments that I had to, but didn't want to, hear during my pregnancy and after NiVi was born. I would have liked to add that all these characters are fictitious and do not resemble anyone living or dead. However, fortunately or otherwise, they are very much for real and living :-)

Here goes...

'Eat as much as you want and whatever you want before you deliver.'

... However genuine and well meant this statement may be, I doubt if you can really eat as much as you want and all that you want... Especially during the last couple of months with your little one cuddled inside and hardly any room left. Didn't work for me, not sure about the others.

'Oh!! You want to have a girl?!'

... YES!! And I will only prefer to reserve my reactions on this one... Lest I get violent with my vocabulary. We are proud to have NiVi in our lives!

'Congratulations! How does it feel.. (And then before you even smile and begin to say thanks)... Are you "able" to feed her??!!'

... Most irritatingly timed question when you are still in the hospital and recouping. Almost everyone seems to be curious and/or concerned about this. Depending on the age of your 'well wisher', this question will most likely be followed by a lecture to the effect of 'mother's feed is the best for your baby'. Every new mom knows this, people!! I think we should just let her and the baby be. Let them take their time and settle down... in what, I think, is nature's best example of human bonding :-)

'Does she sleep well at night??'

... Reflex response... Oh yes!!! My baby has super natural powers of sleeping through the night without wanting to be fed or cleaned!!! Such a painful question to pose to someone who is already zombified, displaying all signs of lack of sleep!

'... And you thought raising a child was easy??!!

...This statement will mark the end of a detailed discussion on all the challenges you are facing as a new mother. All through you would be made to believe that you have a very empathetic listener... And then this question pops up suddenly, leaving you saying 'hnmmm'... and thinking '@#$%'.

'Who does she look like??' 

... Now there's nothing really wrong with this question but I just find it too clichéd. And the irony here is that all my friends think she resembles me, all his friends think she resembles him and all our common friends think she resembles both of us :-D 

Am sure there will be many more such questions in the months ahead. Time for me to check with my mommy-wiki's... so that I can be better prepared ;-)

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Will It Make It To The List?

With movies like The Bucket List, Dasvidaniya and Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara doing the rounds for years, you will more often than not come across people listing out their personal Bucket Lists - on either one form of social networking or the other. Blogs to the effect of '10 things to do before you die' have been the in thing for a long while now.

I have always been inspired to publish my Bucket List... but have somehow not bothered to take out time for it. Maybe I am lazy, maybe I am not managing my time well enough, or maybe I am hesitating to publish my only item on the list that I would want to do before I die - 'To prepare my Bucket List' (and obviously live to see it materialize!) :P

I am not quite up to getting this list published as yet. I need some more nudging and pushing. I also need to spend some time and prioritize my wish list - just to make sure what I desire the most gets due attention before the cliched 'bucket' is kicked!

For the moment, I am listing out random thoughts that are screaming out loudly enough to ensure they make it to my coveted list. Maybe I can refer to this list later when I get down to preparing 'The List'.

Make My Trip

I wish to travel to every corner of India and if I am done with that, then possibly nearby countries and eventually the rest of the world. I want to meet people of all kinds, eat all kinds of vegetarian cuisine, experience all the must-do's and must-see's of all the places I visit, take loads of pictures (it's been ages since I had photo updates on FB :P) etc. Basically this one's about realizing the freedom of being able to experience everyone and everything that has been created around me.

Chit Chaat

Another of my wishes is to satiate my appetite for Indian chaats, leaving no plate unturned :P. From all the details I have collected so far Indore's street food and chaats seem to top the list. So for the moment the plan is to travel down to Indore for a day long chaat experience and catch the last train back home :)

Are the Roads Ready for Me???
This has been a long pending wish. I wish to play Roadrash... real time!!! Several strings attached though. I should be allowed to drive as I please on roads and terrains of my choice. I should be allowed to switch between a whole array of automobiles that should be available at my disposal. I should be allowed to drive and ride at speeds of my choice. I should not be held responsible for all the bloodshed I cause en-route. I should be allowed to choose the people who would trespass my route so that I enjoy the bloodshed I cause (I barely knew I had a 'wicked me' hidden within :P) !!!

Trucking Along

This one's a more sober wish if pitted against my Realtime Roadrash wish above. I wish to drive a huge truck on an empty road. The truck must be fully loaded with goods to make the drive a tough and slow one. I don't know why I fancy this idea but I want to do it. Maybe I'll know why, when I do it eventually. I did forget though, to mention that the empty roads should have a couple of dhabas that dish out lip-smacking homely food. This will help me complete the whole truck driver experience :)

Winged Wish

This one is a rather simple and relatively achievable wish. I wish to fly a helicopter and am also OK with flying as a passenger. I'd rather leave the technicalities to more experienced hands to ensure I live to see my other wishes materialize :) I want to fly around places I visit by road otherwise and get a birds eye view of all those places. 

Super Powers

I so badly wish I am blessed with some superhuman powers to set right a few things and a lot of people around me. It hurts to feel helpless in daily situations where some 'strangely blessed' people get away with their ways. Whether it is a government servant not doing his duties, or a corrupt politician busy filling his coffers, or an educated idiot breaking traffic rules on the road, I wish not to feel helpless the next time I come across these kinds. I would like to have some superhero-like powers to be able to teach them a lesson. For starters, maybe, I should have the option of picking them up and hurling them onto some other planet... without a return ticket attached!!! 

Get Published

A very far-fetched wish this one. I would possibly surprise myself if this one materializes some day. But I still would like to fancy the idea of getting published in this lifetime. After all, 'Thoughts become Things'!!! :) I want people to purchase my paperbacks off bookstore shelves and I want to see my husband smile at them  with pride. He has been instrumental in getting me to dream big and get this one on to my wish list. Seeing him see me realize this wish means a lot to me, even more than getting published itself :)

Big Applause

Another crazy wish I have is to be able to get a stadium full of Indian cricket fans to cheer for me like they do for an India-Pakistan match. I am ready to practice a bit of cricket, try some rare shots like the Dhoni Helicopter or the Sehwag Uppercut or any other cricketing gimmick that will get the audience to roar in applause and cheer for me. I have no clue why I wished this one up, guess the self-obsessed narcissist in me got me to do it :)

I guess I am done for now. I think I should rather spend some time looking for brass lamps that I can rub out a Genie from. I am very sure it is going to take a Genie of sorts to get most of these wishes to materialize :)

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Back to School... A Walk Down Memory Lane!!!

I walked into a Staples store the other day and there were these posters that advertised some interesting 'Back to School' offers. Colorful stationary, school bags and all other interesting school accessories. Wished I was in school still.

June is the month schools reopen in Bombay. June was the month I loved because of all the new school time goodies we got to buy. New books, new uniforms, new school bags [if we managed to wear and tear the old one ;)], new ribbons to tie our plaits, new pencil boxes, new fountain pens etc etc...

We are almost at the end of June and I remembered that I had promised myself a post on what I miss about my times at school. So here it is in completely random order... just as it came to mind...

• My school itself - St. Agnes Girls' High School, Byculla!!! I miss the huge campus walking in and out of its gates.
• Calling myself an Agnesian - especially in the presence of girls from Gloria's and St. Annes. (do not know why!!!)
• Red House, Blue House, Yellow House and Green House - Red House being mine and my favourite :).
• The colorful slides, monkey poles and the towering yellow giraffe in the primary school garden.
• The framed rhymes that were displayed across the hall in the ground floor of the primary school building. Somehow those pictures and rhymes always had me awestruck... I have stared at them endlessly.
• The playroom that was full of colorful toys and games. I guess it would charm me even now... as much as it did when I was in primary school. It's the kid in me to blame again :).
• The audio visual sessions we had where we were treated to some nice movies.
• Moral Science as a subject and the notebook with colored pages for it.
• The huge black piano and the 'singing' classes we used to have.
• The famous freeze-bell.
• Lining up on the grounds and the assemblies that followed.
• Sitting cross legged in those assemblies and the knee-fights that followed ;)
• Playing Sunday Monday on the building stairs
• The samosas, ragda and bhel in the school canteen - and the gossips about how someone found a cockroach in the canteen food :D
• Sports Day - and the compulsory attendance rules for non-participants like me :)
• The Inter-school sports meet (cannot recollect the name) and the endless cheering we did for our school.
• The Agnes-Mary's girl school - boy school fights and wars :)
• Annual Prize Distributions - and how my parents clapped with pride when I stepped up on stage to collect mine :)
• Open Days and the exhibitions of books, craft work and needle work and the complimentary packet of Simba wafers from mom :)
• Prefects with their sashes and belts - checking our nails, rolled down socks, shorts, badges and what not.
• Flag hoisting and singing the national anthem on Republic Day and Independence Day
• Taking turns in class to sit on the last bench - learnt to play book cricket on one of those days :)
• The entire class getting punished and made to stand in a straight line on the tarred road in the hot sun.
• The chemistry, physics and biology labs - including the skeleton in there :)
• PT classes, Sir Andrew and his English and the way the girls took his case.
• The green benches in the corridors that served as our lunch tables in the primary school and the huge lunch room for senior school too.
• All of the teachers there... they all had something special about themselves and that could make another blog post by itself!
• Baking classes and Ms. Farida and her ways!!! I remember we once ate up the extra cheese after making a dish. We got one of her 'You girls are made (read made, understood mad)!' for that. :D
• Color dress days at school on special occasions.
• Going around the whole school distributing sweets to all the teachers on my birthday.
• Standing in front of a whole class of girls singing 'Happy Birthday to Priya' :)
• Falling down, getting bruised and having that red medicine applied on to it.
• The morning prayers and news being read out on the intercom.
• The raffle forms for donations that we had to collect. There were another 25 odd Agnesians in the campus where I lived. Imagine rushing to every house before the others did.
• The science journals that we needed to complete in senior school with diagrams and experiment observations.
• The Science Exhibition we had in Class X. We went on to win it and participate in the inter school competition too. We did up something on Garbage Recycling and were super excited about it.
• The huge library we had and the librarian Ms. Pramila Pant!!! Some of my friends got her convinced that my classmate Sriya and I were twin sisters :)
• Polishing the black shoes and washing and applying white polish to the PT shoes - a weekend task that my sisters and me did dutifully to avoid lectures from dad.
• My school uniform - loved the smart white uniform-red tie combination.
• Waiting for the school bus to come and pick us up in the mornings and searching for the 'Blue' bus every evening :)
• Travelling by BEST to school after seventh standard.
• Walking, talking, breathing, road crossing with Nancy Drews and Enid Blytons!!!
• Different subjects like arts, crafts, baking, community living, social service etc
• Identifying hills, rivers and state capitals with different colors on the outlined maps of India for the geography exam
• Standing in line to collect our corrected answer papers. Totalling and re-totalling the scores hoping the teacher had made a mistake.
• The Khandala retreat in class X.
• Picnics every year - from Hanging Gardens to the Planetarium to Esselworld and Tiku-ji-ni-wadi.
• Collecting the hall tickets for the board exams, the school farewell and finally walking out of school with our SSC marksheets :(

I told you it was a long list. I am sure I have missed out a lot of other memorable things. Probably because I got carried away thinking about these. Would love to read your opinions on this.

Whether you were from Agnes or not, I am sure my school day memories would have taken you back to your own!!! Spare a moment and walk down your memory lane. You will come back smiling :).

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dil toh bachcha hai ji...

It has taken me over a month now to get over the fact that I am a year older all over again!!! I am one step closer to stepping out of my 20's and it is a somewhat weird feeling.

I am not of the vain variety who dreads growing old. I do not hear an 'aunty... aunty... aunty' echo when younger ones call me 'aunty'! I do not freak out when I see that odd silver strand on my head. Well, atleast I do not yell loud enough to let the neighbours know :)

Aging, according to many other like minded people, is a state of mind. And thankfully for me, I have managed to keep the child in me alive and kicking! There's a thin line between holding on to the kid in you and being kiddish and immature. I am guessing I haven't crossed the line. Maybe the grown-ups around me can answer that. :)

I was reminded today of all the fun things I did as a kid. Took this chance to list out some of them.

School
I miss everything about school. From classes to special classes, homework to handiwork, black shoes to white sneakers, uniforms to 'colour dress' days, Open Days to Annual Prize Distributions, Class I to Class X... I miss it all. I still remember how we had this freeze bell rule at school. Whenever it was time for class after a break, we would hear 2 bells. The first bell was called the freeze bell. It was like a game of statue. You stand still and do not move for a good 30 seconds or so. On hearing the second bell we were to line up and get to class. Funny and peculiar it may sound, but we did it day in and day out. So much that I miss it till date. Loads of memories from school time are flooding my mind now. I think I will save them all for another post.

Summer Vacations
You call it jealousy or you call it reminiscing old memories but I simply cannot stop envying all the school kids in my apartment. Their summer vacations are on... and they are in the best of spirits. This part of the year used to be the best in all my years at school. I loved making that day long train journey from Bombay to Madras for a 2 month vacation with my grandparents. I miss all those long warm summers that I spent with them and everything they did to make my vacation even more special. Love you thatha and paati!!!

Doordarshan
Satellite transmission and DTH services have taken the television by storm. Channels have run into triple digit figures. Reality shows are the order of the day with melodramatic serials not far behind. Kareena Kapoor can throw a tantrum about missing her favourite saas-bahu serial, only to see Saif recording it for her to watch later!!! Cut back to a few years ago (few is not an understatement... the kid in me adds :D). Doordarshan was our only source of entertainment on television. DD-I and DD-II were more than enough to keep us entertained. I miss all the TV shows I watched on Doordarshan as well as the movies that were telecast over the weekend. Nukkad, Wagle ki Duniya, Mungerilal ke Haseen Sapne, Jungle Book, Circus, Fauji, Byomkesh Bakshi, Tehkikaat, Mahabharata, Ramayana, Superhit Muqabla, Chitrahaar, Daawat, Udaan Surabhi, ... Oh I miss them all!!!

Bedtime@9.30p.m.
The Parent's Rule Book at our house clearly stated that we needed to get to bed by 9.30pm. That ensured we caught up on all the sleep our body needed. Over the years I have been wishing my family a good night's sleep later and later on the clock. I cannot remember when was the last time I went to sleep as early as 9.30pm. It is well past midnight by the time I retire for the day. Crazy lifestyles need a little order too. I have decided to consciously work on this. Early to bed and early to rise (the bigger challenge!!!) will surely make me healthy, wealthy and wise... on second thoughts let us make that - healthy, wealthy and wiser :)

Fancy Dress Competitions
I miss the many fancy dress shows I participated in. My mum looked forward to these more than me :). I remember getting dressed up as Baby Krishna once and as a Hawaian girl on another occasion. I won prizes for both :). We had these annual functions in our residential complex for Diwali and New Year's Eve. The whole process of deciding on what we're going to dress up as, preparing for it and going up on stage and enacting it out was a wonderful experience. I also participated in some group dances for some of these functions but somehow the Fancy Dress Competitions linger on in my mind. I will look up some of the pictures and hope to P.S. them to this post.

Kid Books
Tintin, Asterix and Obelix, Noddy, Chacha Chowdhary, Target, Tinkle, Champak, the complete Enid Blyton series, Secret Seven, Famous Five, Nancy Drew, Hardy Boys - I am sure all or most of these feature on your list of favourite childhood books. I used to eat, drink, walk, talk, yawn, sleep and breathe books. Somehow, over the years I have not been able to devote as much time to books. I still love reading all of these books. I actually enjoy it even more when I read them now. I remember bringing down the library shelves in our clubhouse to find the best of books. Since I could get only one of them issued per week I would hide my personal selection behind some books that were rarely ever touched by the others. This would ensure they remained there for the rest of the week :). The best part would be the glances others shot at me when they saw me climb up a chair to reach the top-most shelf. The glance would be followed by a feeling of awe and shame put together when they noticed that the top-most shelf stocked books as heavy as micro or macro economics, physics or nuclear research. They thought they needed to learn a few things from this whiz-kid called ME :)

Fun Games
There used to be a host of games we kids would play every evening. Played a lot of interesting outdoor games like Catch 'n Cook, Blind Man's Buff, Kho-kho, Lagori, hopscotch (Googled this out... we used to call it 'Tippar' or 'Tipri' :D), Kitty Kitty Coming, Chor Police, Saakhli, Langdi, Hide 'n Seek, GoooooooollllllddddddSssssppppppott (that's how we used to yell it out :D) and many more. It has been years and years since I have even made a mention of these games. I have not seen kids playing all of these in the last so many years. Let your kids be kids and let them come up with silly yet interesting games like these and give it a name of their choice. Urge them to use their PC games and TV videogames as stress busters when they are much older.

*******

Wow!!! This post has been such a refresher. It took me back down memory lane and brought back many pleasant memories... each with a smile on my face. There sure are a lot of other things that may come to my mind. Will share those on my blog space later.

My take on growing up would be - Grow up as you are doing anyways but remain a child at heart always. I love to pamper the kid in me. I try as much to do everything I loved doing as a kid. This post has only helped me strengthen my stand. The kid in me is happy! The kid in me is jumping with joy! The kid in me is waiting for more! The kid in me is nudging me to hum along... 'dil toh bachcha hai ji' :)

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Random Ramblings

THIS IS MY BLOG AND I STILL OWN IT!!!

Guess I needed that disclaimer given the fact that I have been in hiding for so long :).

My blog ranking on indiblogger got promoted to 43!!!! Yaay!!! All the more reason to write more and keep my space online alive.

I was not sure what to write about and that was when I realized that there are so many thoughts zipping through my head. I thought I could simply share them with you all... at the risk of rambling randomly :)

I have begun to love cooking and I enjoy learning and trying out new dishes once in a while. For all you novices like me, here's something you could refer to when you're left wondering how much sugar and how much spice :)

I have realized that aerobics is a fun way to lose weight. I have no doubts about the fun part, about the weight I will have to wait and see :)

I read in the news about how this psychic excise officer shot and killed a young girl and got killed by the police himself!!! Some people think the police should not have opened fire! I think it was better he paid the price for what he did. Otherwise this too would have ended up as long drawn legal battle that would go on endlessly till the girl's distraught family finally gives up.

I read somewhere that Raj Thackeray has been pulled up for calling VT... 'VT'. For me Victoria Terminus will always remain 'Victoria Terminus' and Bombay will always remain 'Bombay'. So I really do not see a problem with the way Raj Thackeray referred to it. They are having trouble remembering the names they have given. Doesn't irk me one bit!

There is a lot of talk and tweet about the Womens' Reservation Bill. I am confused whether I should celebrate because my clan has been empowered or whether I should worry about the probability that 33% of the Parliament could be filled up with remote controlled Rabri Devi clones!!!

The IPL is on in full swing. I know because that is the only thing that runs on TV at home and also because it has been a fortnight since I have even seen the TV remote and even more so because my husband pretends like he's paying attention to me... only when Akshay Kumar begins to laugh like he's been bitten by the Rahul Mahajan bug :D

Bangalore is getting hotter and hotter. Very unlikely they say. Grow more trees I say!

And on that note, I think I have a blog post ready to publish :). I hope to come back with something more concrete soon!!!

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Oh!!! What a year this was!!! :)

It feels like yesterday when I bid adieu to 2008. It feels like yesterday when I wished all my friends a 'Happy New Year'. It feels like yesterday when I made my secret resolutions for 2009. And today is New Years' Eve already!!!

I like this time of the year when it's all festive and fun. We have so many festivals to celebrate through the year but the month of December and its last few days have this very specially different feeling.

Here's a quick round-up of some of the special things that happened to me during the last one year...

• Made a trip with family to Mysore and Coorg. Lovely experience.
• My little niece completed a year in February. She started walking around on her birthday. It was such a beautiful sight to see the little one taking her first few baby steps. She's moved on to running around, jumping around and tumbling around. She has even started talking now. She's one adorable niece. I miss my dear little Harini.
• Shifted base to Bangalore in February. Joined up with Infosys. I am not commenting on how green (no pun intended!) the grass is on this side of the fence ;) but somehow it feels nice to be a part of India's most sought after company.
• Ran a shopping marathon for nearly 5-6 months across every mall and every other shopping complex in Bangalore. I had my reasons and I had fun :).
• The year that's rolling over has been a really special one for me. I met someone special and got married to him this year. He's changed everything around me... and made everything around me so special. Thank you Sweetheart... this one's for you... for everything!!!
• My family just grew bigger. I now have an extended family - with the most adorable parents-in-law, the most bindaas sister-in-law and whole lot of new uncles, aunts, cousins and friends!!! I love all the attention they give me and I enjoy staying in touch with all of them.
• He and Me went to the Andaman Islands together. It was one awesome trip. The clear blue-green waters, the clean white beaches and the dense forests were captivating. We visited Havelock Island, Ross Island and a few places in Port Blair itself. We had a wonderful week-long getaway that let us give each other all the time we had.

2009 will always remain as one of my favourite years... thanks to these and many other special moments in the last one year!!!

2009 came... and went by like any other year before it. 2009 came... and brought each one of us our share of smiles and frowns. 2009 came... and will disappear into history in a few hours from now. 2009 came... only to pass by and make way for 2010!!!

May the New Year brighten up each one of our lives and bring in an infinite supply of happy and pleasant moments. Wishing you all a Wonderfully Happy New Year!!!

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Gate Crashers

(Here's the script I used for Project 6 of Toastmasters at the Chennai Covansys Toastmasters Club [CCTM]. Won the Best Speaker prize for this one too :-). Do read through and leave me your valuable comments.)

Has any one ever gate crashed a wedding reception???
Something I thought could be very exciting!!!

Our lecturer for Operations Research Madam Phansalkar’s son was getting married that day. My batchmate Prashant was also a faculty for undergraduate courses in our college. Phansalkar Madam had sent an invitation to Prashant for her son’s wedding that day.

That day was a usual day at college. Lectures were over and we were lazing around in the canteen over poha and chai. Prashant too was there with us. He read out the invitation … ‘You are cordially invited with family and friends…’

Now, when you are away from home for a long time, things like good food, dressing up, mingling with guys other than your boring batchmates are things that turn you on... ‘Cordially invited with family and friends’ struck the same chord among all 10 of us.

Prashant called out… 'Those who want to come for the reception, please raise your hands'... (the professor effect :P). Shamelessly I raised my hand… then I saw 9 other shameless people around me.

My friend Shagufta, a typical tomboy, and a total extrovert did the head count aloud. Prashant was visibly baffled; he was just being formal... Shagufta was just being normal!!!

Poor Prashant had to maintain that friendly gesture and said 'Yes yes... why not' and turned to the rest of us... one by one people started making excuses and began dropping out.

I badly needed a feast. Shagufta had been away from home for her graduation as well. Probably that made her hungrier for good food. She gave me the sternest look and said… 'Priya... you are not dropping out... We'll just be eating a tiny portion of the food from soooo much food... wont harm anyone'. I was game and thought it will be fun to try out. Gate crashing was something I always wanted to do. I accepted.

She gave the pleading 'please don’t drop out' look to another close friend Jay. Guess what… boys always agree and so did Jay.

Finally we got ready by around 6.00 pm and headed to Jay's house. We could hear sounds from inside his place...
'Oh no!!’
'Aah that looks better'...
Shagufta and I thought Jay was definitely deciding what he should wear!!

We rang the bell... and banged the door... Jay called from inside... 'Come in... Door is open'. We went in to see him playing some super fast car game on his PC - dressed in shorts and a tee shirt!!! We were irritated!!!

Shagufta switched off the PC and in her usual tone said... 'Jayy... chalna nahi hai kya' which means don’t we have to leave now?

Only then did Jay actually notice us. After all boys will be boys… switch off the TV or PC… only then their minds open up. He pushed back the chair and sprang up the moment he saw us... to him we were overly dressed for a usual evening - he least expected that we would actually dare to barge into the reception… uninvited.

Jay tried the ‘hurt the ego’ stunt on me. 'Priya!!! I never expected this from you...class topper doing such things just doesn’t suit you'. Shagufta came to my rescue... 'Jay, good food is waiting for us... but its not waiting for us forever... are you coming... now!!!' I stood there smiling at him with a 'serves you right' look.

We helped him find something to wear. Actually to make sure we don’t look overly dressed we dug out his most ethnic kurta and made him decide on that.

Jay is someone who was very conscious about his looks.
He looked at the kurta and at then at us… 'Are you girls sure I should wear this?'
Shagufta said 'Of course yes Jay... simple yet elegant'.
'Absolutely... all the girls at the reception would go crazy over you', I added.
That did it. Jay was ready in a minute and we were out with Prashant in the next 5 minutes.

Seeing only three of us, Prashant looked a lot more relieved than in the morning. He got the company he wanted instead of the crowd!!! Prashant called for an auto and gave Phansalkar Ma’am’s residence address.

We reached her house… but there was no activity. It was dark and quiet… no sign of celebration… no sign of food!!! And it was not April First. Only then it struck us that receptions are not normally held at people's homes. In all the excitement and enthusiasm, we did not read the venue details on the invite... 'Cordially invited with family and friends' did not let us look beyond.

The boys were embarrassed. Shagufta was angry… may have been hungry too. I was lost. Prashant rushed to the security guard to find out where the reception was happening. It was happening at a hall just behind Jay's house. Jay could not hold back his anger. We could not hold back our laughter. Jay sighed 'Aaah!!! Too much', Prashant the perfect host said... 'Come on let’s rush no more delay'... Shagufta promptly agreed with a 'Yes yes!!!'... I was more practical... 'Bhaiya, Shivaji Nagar'... I called out for an auto.

We finally reached the hall and stepped in. The big fans at the entrance, the red carpet, the potted plants along the walk way, food counters visible at a distance - this was the wedding venue!!!

The strong scented air that the fan blew on our faces shook us up... Shagufta and I exchanged looks - guilt struck both of us - but it was too late... Jay was already prancing around the hall in his new kurta and Prashant was mingling with the other faculty members... we had been abandoned!! Shagufta and I were embarrassed – now!!! After a couple of moments both of us exchanged looks again – as if telling each other - 'Big Deal!!'. We started having a good time - pulling Jay's leg, checking out the other guests, what the others were wearing etc.

After a while, our course coordinator walked in. We began hiding ourselves behind each other, in the process revealing all 3 of us. Sir smiled at us and spoke very normally. Some other staff members were also sweet enough to speak to us. We are sure... behind those smiles they were thinking... 'How come these people are here’?

Finally the inevitable happened. Phansalkar Ma’am spotted us. She saw our pink faces and tried to calm us down... "I'm sooo happy you'll came for the wedding... Don’t you'll leave without eating" she said pulling my cheeks like a typical aunty. "Tell her that's exactly why we're here' Shagufta whispered in my ear... I was confused how to react... and simply nodded. Prashant and a couple of other staff members were laughing at us for the rest of the evening.

Finally after all this, we headed to the food counter... and ate to our fullest. We were so shameless we did not even wish the couple, nor did we present them anything. We just ate and ate and ate.

The next day at college was good fun. We told long stories about our act of bravery. Our batch mates realized we were lying when we skipped Operations Research lectures for the rest of the term.

(PS: We never dared to tell Phansalkar Ma'am that the food was simply mouth-watering at the reception... Ma'am if you happen to read this... I'll be happy the message got conveyed :) Prashant thanks so much for reading out the invite that day... and Jay and Shagufta... a big thank you to both of you for matching my Shamelessness Quotient :P)

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Colourful Chaos

(Here's the script I used for Project 5 of Toastmasters at the Chennai Covansys Toastmasters Club [CCTM]. Won the Best Speaker prize for this one too :-). Do read through and leave me your valuable comments.)

Two dozen eggs… three bottles of coconut oil… 10 packets of natural colour… water as required. No, I am not demonstrating some delicious egg-based recipe, I am just reviewing our checklist for the next Holi celebration.

Holi as we all know is the festival of colours. It is a very popular festival up North. It is usually celebrated over two days starting with the burning of the demoness Holika in a huge bonfire at night. The next day is called Dhulhendi – where people spend the day throwing coloured powder and water at each other. Thandai is a popluar refresher that people prepare and drink during that day. Bhang – an intoxicant made from hemp leaves is added to the thandai – to add more spirit to the festive spirit perhaps!!!

I think that is enough of an introduction to a festival which probably by now quite clearly comes across as my favourite festival. Well… before I continue let me say that Holi is not only NOT my favourite festival but also it is one festival that I dread the most.

Holi was celebrated with a lot of enthusiasm in our residential colony in Bombay. Kids of all ages along with the parents would have loads of fun throwing coloured powder on each other and spraying coloured water with their pichkaris. Teenaged boys would get this tank like box filled with coloured water and would literally pick up everyone and throw them into the tank. It is an unwritten rule about Holi – no one can be less coloured than the other. Some of the coloured uncles and aunties would go around visiting homes to apply the traditional tikka of gulal or red powder… never once did I oblige them. What begins as a tikka on the forehead ends up leaving you all coloured… cannot really blame them… must be the bhang in action!!!

As a kid… well to be honest… even as a grown up kid, I would literally lock myself in my room or sometimes the bathroom to stay away from all this chaos in colour. All that I’ve described is what I managed to see from behind the curtains of my closed windows. They say that time is the best healer… but for me this fear of Holi just keeps increasing every year. I would like to share one recent Holi experience at this point.

This happened when I was studying in Pune. My roommates Jyoti and Kavneet – both from North India – were fretting over the fact that they were not able to play Holi that year because we had an exam on the following day. I was so secretly happy!!!

We were busy with our books. It was around 2 pm in the afternoon when Jyoti’s mobile rang. She picked up the phone. It was another batchmate, Mayank. He wanted some book for the next day’s exam. Mayank was from our group… but you know when it is Holi I do not take any chances. Seeing the fear on my face, Jyoti covered the handset and checked if I thought it was a hoax. I nodded my head even before she finished asking. But Mayank sounded genuine on the phone. He said they had already finished playing Holi in the morning and that he had just finished his bath and lunch and was walking towards our house to collect the book. Jyoti was convinced. Though she missed playing Holi she was in no mood to get wet and coloured because she had loads to study. But she was convinced.

I still had my doubts. Boys - you can never trust… and trusting them on Holi is like a huge gamble!!! I took the lead in helping Jyoti pack up the book. We wrapped the book in a lot of newspaper, fastened it with a rubber band and then put it in a plastic bag.

In Pune, landlords come up with these silly rules for female tenants… one of their favourites being ‘Boys not Allowed’. Our building was a little inside the compound with a long narrow stretch of road to walk to the main gate. Jyoti was supposed to meet Mayank at the gate and hand over the book. I watched from the balcony as she approached the gate. I do not know what prompted her to be cautious, but when she reached the gate she slowed down and took a peek outside on the right side first and then towards the left. I was proud of her for being so cautious. The next moment she turned back and began running as fast as she could. In the same moment some 20 coloured creatures were chasing her. The next moment poor Jyoti was drenched in colour. I was stunned and I began yelling for help. Kavneet also rushed to the balcony. She was able to identify those boys… they were our batchmates – Mayank included. All I could risk for my room mate was to stay put in the balcony and call out for her. It was a well calculated risk – they could not get me coloured even though I was in an open balcony without curtains - we lived on the fifth floor… if nothing else at least gravity would save me from getting coloured.

Poor Jyoti came back home in some time. It didn’t look like she was out only for a few minutes. They had even broken eggs on her head and it was dripping all over. The boys waited for some more time… outside the gate. They were forcing Kavneet and me to go down and get coloured for 5 mins to avoid fatal consequences later. For me, those 5 minutes were fatal and we did not relent. ‘Boys not allowed’ made sense for once!

I definitely appreciate the spirit of fun about Holi, but when it comes to all this colourful chaos, please count me out. If you have your checklist in place… advance wishes to all of you for the next Holi and the many more to come. I would never risk wishing you in person anyway.

(Special thanks to Jyoti, Kavneet, Mayank and the rest of the coloured creatures who let me use their names without their permission :P)

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Munich Moments

July 2008 – one month that I’ll always remember. I was out on my first trip abroad... all by myself!!! I visited the beautiful city of Munich in Germany. There’s loads to write about the trip, but there were some really small (some may seem silly too!!!) yet meaningful things that I just cannot forget. I thought it will be better to simply list them out without getting into the details. These moments lasted only for a couple of seconds or minutes… but they bring a smile on my face even now. Read on and hopefully you would be smiling by the time you’re through with the list...

• The weird first timer feeling I had on my first international flight – the travel pillow, the blanket, the headphones and the built-in TV with its retractable remote!!!
• The strange feeling of not feeling different when I got off at Dubai airport
• The even more strange feeling when I didn’t feel lost or home-sick at Dubai airport and during the trip in general
• The pleasantly enchanting feeling when I first stepped out of Munich airport… there was something in the chill air that gave me a warm welcome
• The real life phoren experience with foreigners all around me… actually I was a foreigner this time round :)
• The cool feeling of being driven around in a BMW
• The promptness with which Sabrina gave me an agenda for my time at Germany – agenda of what they had planned out for me to do each evening and over the weekend :)
• The fantastic roadways with really fast cars speeding along
• The clean broad roads and the trees that lined them
• The apartment hotel room with a built-in kitchenette… my home sweet home at Munich
• The smart corridor lights in the hotel that would light up every time I stepped into the corridor :)
• The Maggi noodles and other ready-to-eat stuff that I cooked up for dinner sometimes
• The whole breakfast experience at the hotel every morning – all kinds of breads, cheese, marmalades, juices and the serve yourself arrangement
• The whole ‘I am a traveler and I have a map to help me around’ experience
• The train travels and the English-German instructions for boarding/ alighting on every station
• The escalators at all the stations – the ones that worked and the ones that didn’t too :)
• The huge sprawling Allianz campus at Unterfuhring and the sparkling glass exteriors
• The perfect work-life balance that the Germans maintain – when they’re working they’re working… when they’re not working they’re living life!!!
• The huge canteen at the Allianz office with so much of food… the pure vegetarian in me had to settle for the salads and fruit juices though!!!
• The wonderful company of colleagues at Allianz and how they tried their best to converse with me in the little English they knew
• The almost every evening visits to beer gardens around the city
• The health conscious Germans walking, jogging, cycling, skating or playing football while the others drank beer
• The funny and otherwise unimaginable importance that beer got over water
• The enthusiasm and general spirit of every localite I came across and the sincere attempts they made to make me feel comfortable
• The effort Mr. Grimm made at the Johanneskirchen beer garden to translate everything on the menu from German to English – helping me make sure that it was vegetarian :)
• The baked potato and cream that I finally ordered – took me to my Enid Blyton days where all her characters had potatoes baked in their jackets with cream and herbs :)
• The chill in the air and the occasional rains
• The funny experience of having daylight up to 9.30 or 10.00 pm
• Christopher Street Day and how I was dazed at all that I saw!!! (I know what you’re gonna be Google-ing next :P)
• Roaming around the streets by myself in my attempts to explore the city
• Viktualienmarkt and its awesome spread of stalls selling everything from fruits, flowers, cheese and beer to handmade dolls, straw dolls and all kinds of cute and colourful wooden dolls
• The street-side musicians and acrobats who entertained the crowds
• The beautiful flowers outside windows and balconies of most of the buildings – the uniform pattern added so much charm to it
• The awesome architecture all over… the churches, the town hall, The Residense, Odeonsplatz etc
• The contrasting architecture of the old buildings and the ultra modern shopping complexes along Karlsplatz Stachus
• The small packed shop Max Krug – that had a huge collection of cuckoo clocks and other Munich memorabilia to choose from
• The tall enchanting church towers and the beautiful glass paintings on their glass panes
• The special feeling inside the churches I visited – Frauenkirche, Peterskirche and St. Maxmillian Church
• The walks I took along the River Isar... never knew I could give myself such good company :)
• The beautiful refreshing green landscapes at Olympia Park, Hofgarten and Englischergarten
• The fairy tale kind experience of visiting the Nymphemburg Schloss Castle and the sprawling gardens behind it
• The fun ride I had with Sabrina in the open top double decker tourist bus on the weekend sightseeing tour
• The ride down Maxmillian Street – the most expensive street in Munich where the world’s costliest brands sell their stuff
• The pista, vanilla and hazelnut ice creams that I had for 1 Euro each :)
• The visit I made to Prasad’s house at Bonner Platz… felt great meeting his wife and daughter Madhulika and enjoyed eating Indian food in foreign land
• The visit I made to Karsten’s house in Gauting… meeting his wife Karen, kids Lhasa and Maya, the pancakes and vanilla ice cream with fresh strawberries for dinner... strolling around in Gauting was a wonderful experience too
• The visit I made to Jurij’s house… meeting his daughter Milianna, eating the delicious home-made pizza and the rest of the Bavarian delicacies that his wife Tanya had made for me... can't forget the cake too :)
• The BMW World and BMW Museum visit – am not so much of a cars person, but seeing so many cars of one of the most desired brands was an experience by itself
• The Kinetic Sculpture demonstration at the BMW Museum and how we simply couldn't take our eyes off it
• The chocolate shopping that I did at ALDI for my family and friends back home… never shopped for chocolates like that… ever!!!
• The good-byes I bid to every piece of furniture in my hotel room on the day I was leaving (please excuse the senti factor :P)
• The strange feeling I had on the day I had to leave…

Munich never once made me feel lonely, lost or home-sick… that surely means there’s something about the place that makes it really special. What I’ve tried to do here is to list out my moments in Munich that I would never possibly forget…. I’m sure I would have missed out on many such moments in my hurry to post this article online… I will add to the list as and when they come to mind :). If ever you have enough money and time on hand… Munich is a must visit… I truly love the place and would not hesitate to take the next chance I get to be there!!!

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Terrible Tuesday

Tuesday, 26th July 2005. Just another second-day-of-the-week feeling for school children, office-goers et al. The monsoon was almost mid-way in Mumbai. But this Tuesday was different. The rain gods decided to open up on Mumbai, enough only to record India's highest rainfall.
The city experienced incessant rains throughout the afternoon... right through into the evening and through the night as well। I was at office and thanks to modern day buildings with closed windows and neat blinds to add to that cozy comfy air-conditioned feeling, I was not quite aware of how heavy the showers were.

Around 3.00 pm some of my colleaugues started getting messages and calls from friends and relatives about the heavy downpour and its impact on the rail services. If you are a seasoned Mumbaikar, the first thing that'll hurt your sentiments are troubles with the local trains... they ain't called Mumbai's lifeline just like that!!! We casually cracked jokes about the messages and passed them off as rumours that haunt Mumbaikars every monsoon.

Sadly, this time round the 'wolf... wolf...' cry was for real!!! Around 4।00 pm we had an official announcement that due to heavy rains the office would be closed at 4.15 pm so that all employees could try reaching their homes as soon as possible. It was then that all of us got serious and began to look out for options to get home. Frantic calls began... each one jabbing away at the number pads of their cellphones or the landlines trying to reach their folks. A glance at my mobile showed zero network connectivity... Orange was down and out!!! Only my colleagues with Reliance mobile service were able to receive and make calls from their cellphones. Hail Reliance!!!... (not so soon!!!)

With the 4।15pm deadline for closing the office little did we know that we would spend the next 2 days at office. It was one long drawn experience... with all of us stranded at Asian Paints House from Tuesday evening till about noon on Wednesday. I made an attempt to reach my friend who stays just across the station on Santacruz (West). The water logging in the Vakola Bridge and Vakola pipeline areas was just too much for me to cross over from the East to the West. We gave up the idea... back to office. By this time it was almost late evening... power supply was out. Reliance claimed that it had deliberately shut down power supply to avert the chances of short circuits in the nearby areas... point well noted!!! The next 2 days saw us parade aimlessly in office... a lunch and a dinner at the Grand Hyatt (cheers to the big bosses at AP!!!)... general gossips and food for thought... impatience... helplessness... an unwelcome breather from work... unwelcome coz we felt marooned with nothing to do!!!

Anyway, alls well that ends well। Finally, on Wednesday afternoon, all of Asian Paints House decided to walk it out to their homes... relief finally as the rains had stopped for a while after two days of continuous showers. People nicely tucked away their cellphones and cash to avoid them getting wet... wished each other luck and began a marathon walk. Finally, i got my chance to cross over from East to West. *chuckle*

Local train and bus services were totally disrupted। It was impossible to get a means of transport. Walking it out was our only option. I waded through knee deep waters to get to Santacruz station and crossed over to the West. *sigh of relief*

The roads on the West were not as bad। Water had drained away but the traffic was literally bumper to bumper. I was making my way through the traffic to my uncle's place. Upto that point of time, I had only heard of the kind of havoc the rains had created. Loads of stories about how people had to swim or wade through neck deep waters, how people on the roads made human chains to help the women and children find their way safely. I was totally cut off from my friends and family all this while. I wanted to reach them and ask them if they were ok and let them know that I was ok. What impressed me and more importantly touched me during my walk down SV Road on Santacruz (West) was the undying spirit of Mumbaikars. Hundreds of people were stuck in the traffic... many like me were trudging along by road. The local residents of the area were out on the streets distributing drinking water, biscuits, food, tea and coffee to all of us.

Finally, I got to my uncles place। Washed up. Had some grub. Chatted with uncle and aunty. Caught up with all the happenings over the last two days. Called up my folks and chatted a while. Orange was still unable to provide connectivity. Charged my cellphone battery in the hope that it'll be available as soon as Orange is bright and shining!!! Flicked on the TV... scanned for the News Channel and there it was... the rains had had a breathtaking impact on our city during the last two days. Mumbai was brought to a halt. What was more painful was to see how the rains had claimed so many lives - human and cattle as well. People living in the ground floors had to bare the maximum brunt of the rains. Their homes were submerged in water. I heard of lots of people who lost their certificates and other important documents due to the rising water levels within their flats. Sad stories of how people missed a step while wading through the waters and fell into open manholes, were coming in. All in all, the news channels were full of ghastly sights and the toll kept mounting.

Finally, now that the rains had stopped, the blame game began। Disaster Management seemed to be the order of the day. Ironicallly, it hasn't seen the light of the day yet. MPs, Area Corporators and other vote-hungry politicians went into hiding. Those who didnt try hard enough had to face endless questions from news channel and newspaper reporters. A few handled it clumsily... the rest managed to pull it off with the same elan they used to charm their vote banks. Am not anti-Congress... but I sure am anti-politician (and that covers them all!!!). News agencies had enough to spew over the next few days. There were heavy showers again over the weekend. Most people stayed away from office for almost a week. Public transport was heavily affected. The Railways and BEST reported heavy damages to their assets. There was a mounting fear of an epidemic breaking out. Lots of families have been rendered homeless by the wrath of nature.

Mother Nature had her way on 'Terrible Tuesday', but there's always a positive side to everything. The rains may have washed it all out but the time-tested attitude and spirit of the Mumbaikar was right up there. Not a drop of water to dampen it!!! Here's my chance to say thank you. Let's keep that spirit alive, come what may, coz that's what sets Aamchi Mumbai apart.

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